Q:I hope this isn't inappropriate, but as a woman, I don't quite feel comfortable seeing you discussing issues that specifically relate to women since you are a man. I'm not sure this is my place here, since you're also discussing PoC issues that intersect with gender and I'm white. If it's out of line for me, then I'm sorry and feel free to ignore this.

Anonymous

We talked about the following in the past…

  • Single Black mothers and that’s was cool.
  • We talked about how Black women shouldn’t listen to Black men for advice about how to attract us, and if anything, they should be themselves and that was cool.
  • We reblogged something to help a White teacher understand the dos and don’t of talking about Natural Black hair. Black women weighted in while we didn’t say a word and that was cool.
  • We reblogged POSITIVE images of Black imagery (women with straight hair, by the way) and that was cool.
  • We were disgusted about violence against women, no matter the color and that was cool.
  • We talked about Inter-racial relationships and stand up against people dating Black women just for the “Experience” and that was cool.

So, if we talked about all of these things (and more) and it was cool in the past, why suddenly, we are being told (by men and women) to not talk about women’s issues?

Do we not have mothers, sisters, daughters and nieces that we should be concern about? Should we not aim to allow themselves the freedom to grow up without being slut-shamed and stereotyped? Should we turned a blind eye to Black lesbians? Should we not be concerned about how we, as Black men, view women in general? 

We wanna talk about this from a male perspective and we will continue to do so. What we found highly unfair is that people judged us from very few posts. We sat back. We allowed it to die down. We apologized. 

So, we thank you for your concern, however, we will still talk about it. We may push the envelope at times, but it will never be without a good reason. 

Q:The "white women" tag does have WAY more porn. Perhaps the previous person viewed a different tag and missed that glaring fact. On the point about white women being less respected sexually, it comes down to who's doing the talking. I hear a lot of talk and see a lot of actions that show this loud and clear in pornography and every day life. However, as a Black woman, I get a lot of bs from white people looking for "the Black girl experience" like we're a fetish.

idciamme

DING DING DING DING DING DING DING!!!! 

Q:why are African Americans considered traitors or uncle toms if they are republicans?

laviarray

This answer is an educated guess with little research and off the cuff style. Please feel free to correct us.

The Republican Party would be quick to say “Well, Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves!” There’s no denying that he did. You think that would mean that Republicans = the party of choice for “minorities”. However, as years went by, the Democratic Party became the party for minorities, especially when the Republicans started to think of certain Black organizations as a threat to the country. 

(Richard Nixon and Ronald Reagan were the hardest people. We heard Nixon had an “enemy list” with Black Panthers on it.)

Because of historic accounts and present day actions of the Republican party, it’s easy to call Black Republicans “sell outs”. However, keep in mind that these “sell outs” believe that they are doing what’s right for the country as a whole, not just their race.

Other than that, the majority of the Republican Blacks share a lot with Herman Cain; they believe that we should “stop looking at the past and create our own future”, a settlement we somewhat share with them. Too bad they don’t see the irony of some of the current laws that can keep a people back.

We will revisit this question in the future, once we learn more. Thanks for giving us something to think about.

Q:A few months ago, I did a survey of the main shows on broadcast television seeing how many of the main recurring actors are of minority decent. All of the networks had 20% of casted minority actors, (19 for the CW). Do you see this ever improving and do you think it is a good thing as for the current status of tv now?

laviarray

Actually, we noticed a trend that is quite the opposite. In the 90s/early 2000s, there were shows that had a predominantly black cast. Check this list of shows:

  • New York Undercover
  • In Living Color
  • Family Matters
  • The Cosby Show
  • Fresh Prince of Bel Air
  • Girlfriends
  • The Steve Harvey Show
  • Moesha
  • Living Singles
  • Martin

Compare to the list now:

  • The Game
  • For Better or Worse (TP)
  • Meet the Browns (TP)
  • House of Payne (TP)

Other shows may have Black/minority roles within the show, but there’s hardly a show that has a Black lead and that the cast is predominantly Black other than a handful of shows I mentioned.

So, while there’s a chance you’ll see minority roles in a TV series, the cast of said show might still be White by 90%. 

(Note: Yes, Scandal should be on the list, but the cast is not predominantly Black, which is the point of this ask.) 

Q:do you really think that it is kanye's skin color that makes the meme last, or is it his huge ego? kanye is a great entertainer in most aspects, but to me, he has always yearned for attention. at least that's what i draw from his lyrics and some of the things he has done. i don't know exactly how to put it, but i don't think it is JUST that he's black. it may play a factor, but he can also be kind of a douche.

trappedinpiss

The post was more about the origin of the meme than the longevity of it. How he made it last is up to him.

Kanye West is a jerk. Genius, but a jerk.

Q:How would you suggest dealing with a mother who constantly says things like, "You're pretty, but you'll never be as pretty as those white girls. We can't even compete with them, so don't even try." (I'm a WOC, just to clarify)

Anonymous

How about “I don’t look pretty, I look marvelous! I be stuntin on them White girls like no F-in’ joke!”

No? Not good?

Hopefully, you’re not looking at your parental units for self-validation. We learned how disappointing parental units can be at times.

“Parental Units?” Yes, we refer to parents like that because just because they raise you don’t make them all knowledgeable.  We met some progressive parents, some conservative parents, some smart parents and dumb ones. Parents, like everyone else, are influenced by their environments and ideals. 

However, we all have a choice of what can and can’t influence us. So, simply put, look for people who match your ideals… even if it means suppressing the ideals of people that are essential in your life, such as parental units.

Q:What's your take on people that think there shouldn't be a black history month? Or more specifically, that it's racist to have a black history month?

Anonymous

Short Answer: Until you stop treating us as an extracurricular class or make learning of us as part of human history “optional”, there will always be a constant reminder that Black History month always need to exist.

Re: Last Ask

In the last ask, we didn’t address the “it’s so wrong for Whites to borrow from Black cultures” part because the rest of the ask is dressed in pure ignorance.

There’s a difference between “borrowing” and “exploiting”. 9 times out of 10, it’s exploiting the “Black culture”.

We say “Black culture” because there’s no “definiate culture” around Black people. For us to say there is one “Black culture” is for us to simplified Black people. We’re not so simple.

Also, why did we throw up a reply in Swahili, a langugue we don’t really understand?

Simply put… we’re being a smart ass to a troll in a way he didn’t expect it.

Q:If it's so wrong for whites to borrow from black culture, why are you communicating in ENGLISH? Africa has over 2000 languages, learn 1 of them and stop committing the appropriation you accuse others of. Blacks really need to get over your delusions of grandeur. Slavery was invented by your ancestors when the 1st block was dragged across the deserts of Africa by a SEMITE to build the pyramids. CHECK YOUR HANDOUTS. nigger.

Anonymous

*blinks*

Tunaishi katika Marekani. Sisi ni pretty uhakika kuwa kama sisi hata kujaribu kusema kwa mapumziko ya asili ya Kiswahili (moja ya lugha nyingi za Afrika), bila kuelewa. Basi itabidi kutuambia kurudi Afrika na kwamba shit.

Wakati sisi ni saa hiyo, na nafsi yako ndogo-nia, wengi wa lugha ya Kiingereza borrows kutoka lugha zingine.

BTW, Kiingereza kwa mara ya kwanza amesema katika Uingereza, na exceptionism Marekani alifanya hivyo ili Marekani Kiingereza ni tofauti na Uingereza Kiingereza.

Hivyo tangu sisi ni wote kukwama hapa, vipi kuhusu wewe kwenda na kulia machozi nyeupe mahala fulani mwingine?

P.S. We do not know swahili very well and translations may not be accurate due to Google. But “white tears” are in there somewhere. Also something else about “English also borrows from other language” and that it originated in England.

So, in theory, everything in America is borrowed from ever where else.

We speak sarcasm in so many ways.

Q:As a white person, I am now terrified of doing anything that isn't "white" in fears of overstepping my boundaries. I don't know if I should stop my studies in Mandarin Chinese, or stop reading books about Chinese culture...or stop eating Middle Eastern food or drop my African-American Literature course and I am just scared of being that white person who tries to butt in where I'm not wanted. Where is the line drawn? Can I ever take an interest in other cultures? Or is it always exotification?

Anonymous

A bit melodramatic there, ain’t we?

If you may, please take your hand and slap yourself… hard. Then breathe.

The “slapping” is from us to you, with love… sorta. (We’re being equally as dramatic and if you actually did it, then you deserve it.)

We’re not saying “yo fuck off!” when it comes to taking interest in other cultures. We’re saying “know your place,” that’s all. You want to know where the “line” you speak of is? First you have to know that there’s a difference between:

  • Studying and appreciating other cultures.
  • Adapting it and claiming parts of it as your own.
  • Making the culture bigger than the people who represents it.

Maybe an example is easier to digest…

However, before we go into this example, we want to state that it’s a OVER SIMPLIFED example to help paint a picture of a valid point. This example is not meant to be taken literally. (We have to forewarn people because as of late, some people failed to comprehend English. C’est la vie.).

Let’s say you have on your person a pendent with an image of symbol of a coat of arms featuring a fish, a stick, and a grasshopper. This is your family’s crest, something that you are proud of for many, many years. It’s been in your family for generations. Your family members show it to each other as a sign of your family’s proud heritage.

Think of that as your family’s “culture”. We are assuming that when you mentioned culture, you meant “the customary beliefs, social forms, and material traits of a racial, religious, or social group” (source). 

Then one day, an unrelated male friend (let’s assume you’re a female) came to your house and saw your family crest. You explained the history of the crest. The guy thought “cool” and without your knowledge, took a picture of your crest.

Then, five years later, you were walking through the park and said hi to someone who pass by you. You then backtraced to that person because they were wearing something that you recognized.

The person was wearing your family crest! But it’s not a pendent, it was part of a t-shirt design. And clearly, this stranger is not related to you. You asked him how he got that design and he said, “oh, I got it from Pacific Sun! It’s a cool design!”

You suddenly look up and realized… there were people wearing dog tags, sneakers and hats of your family’s crest! No one knew what the crest means… they all just thought it was cool!

This is what we may call “culture appropriation”. When someone took a part of your family culture and render it worthless. Now, it’s nothing but a fashion statement. And it will be years before it goes out of style, thanks to Jay-Z’s recent merger with Pacfic Sun/Rocawear. (totally fictional)

Now, let’s go back to the guy who looked at your family crest for the first time. Instead of taking the picture, let’s replaced it with him saying, “that’s looks so hot on you!” And then he started to take pictures of you with it on. He calls you up the next day and invited you to a party. You came to the party with your pendent on and he’s making you the center of attention… but not because of your personality, your leadership in the debate team… or not even that you’re the head cheerleader. Nope, he drawed everyone’s attention to THAT pendent. On top of it all, he’s messing up the family history, filling in false stuff that happened. You just weakly smiled and was shocked by all this.

That’s an example of “culture exotification”.

Now, let’s go back to the part where you introduce your pendent to your friend for the first time. Your friend sat down and asked “I don’t see why this is important to you. It looks kinda silly!” You explain all the history behind it. The more you explained, the more your friend was interested.

One day, you lost your pendent on campus. Your friend was with you when you screamed “I can’t find my crest!” Your friend starts to look for it with you. Then when you found it and picked it up, someone looked at it and laughed… “you were looking for that fucking piece of junk?” Before you said anything, your friend stepped in and said, “that’s NOT a piece of junk! That’s a family heirloom of value that was passed down for generations!” Your friend was about to give the guy who laughed at you a piece of their mind, but instead, he stepped off, shaking his head.

That’s “culture appreciation/preservation”.

Now, in this oversimplified example, I shown you the difference between appropriation, exotification and appreciation/preservation.

Using your critical thinking skills, you should know where the line should be “drawn”.

We believed we did as much as we can to help you draw your own conclusions between what is acceptable and what isn’t.

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